God Healed Me From Panic Attacks At the Moms in the Making Conference
November 12, 2019
I had dealt with anxiety since I was a teenager. It grew worse once we started trying to conceive. After our loss in 2017, panic attacks started. Anxiety’s hold on me increased even more in the summer of 2019.
The Holy Spirit prompted me to do whatever I could to get to the Moms in the Making conference and He provided the finances. I knew God wanted me there and the devil didn’t, because leading up to it my panic attacks grew worse with dissociative symptoms. A week before the conference, I was told I was about to have a major depressive episode. Along with this, I have a neurological condition called synesthesia which manifests itself in colour. I see words on a page, names, music, or concepts in colour. In the middle of anxiety, the colours would disappear and be replaced by grey. It came to the point that my world was black. The virtual group and my prayer partners prayed.
I had a panic attack driving to the airport, in the airport, on my flights, during my layover, walking into the church, and in the foyer before the conference. Then, the SECOND song of the FIRST worship service said “You’re drowning the grey of fear in brilliant colour.” I cried, because I realized that I had never talked to God about the greys and the blacks, but He knew and He cared. I physically felt a weight crumbling off my shoulders and such joy fill my spirit.
We hadn’t even come to the part of the conference where I learned to break the lie that if anxiety is genetic, I had to deal with it, or Saturday’s prayer for people dealing with anxiety and depression. But what impacted me the most was that the first ten minutes into the conference, God delivered me from anxiety. I am forever grateful for this ministry and the work God is doing through it. The prayers of the virtual group ladies and my prayer partners, the videos about breaking free of anxiety, and the conference are such a huge blessing. I do not want to think of where I would be right now without Moms in the Making.
Britni Mazur – Canada